Congratulations to Joakim Noah

On the 2013-2014 NBA Defensive Player of the Year Award and for taking this awesome family photo with his trophy.

Haven't had time to google search exactly who each of these curly-haired and/or blond family members are, but looks like a really harmonious group we've got here.  I'm also really digging the smug-blonde little man holdin up Joakim's trophy and throwing up the thumbs up at the same time.

This is What Amar'e Stoudemire Wore to a Fashion Show

I know that this is probably high, high fashion that I don't understand, but it really just looks like clothes that a toddler (the white onesy) would put together had he stumbled into both parents closets (mom's furry scarf, dad's gold chain), and decided to dress himself.  So don't know if there is still a debate in the Knicks locker room on who is the worst clothes-wearer, but I'll wait to see if any pictures leak of Iman Shumpert in another kilt or maybe Tyson Chandler in matching leather vest and capris, before I give the award to the outfit pictured above or what I'm calling the "Amar'e as a Bab'y".

Highlight: James Johnson's Reverse and Mike Miller's Impressed Face

Haven't seen one of these reverse jams look as effortless as James Johnson made it look tonight against the Wizards.  Maybe that's why Mike Miller gave Johnson a high fiver and then followed it up with the ole "im so incredulous" shrug.

Pretty neat feat that James Johnson was able to impress Miller because Miller is kind of the "Mr. Seen-it-all" for players making incredible moves within the last decade.  Remember, Miller started his career playing with the in-his-prime T-Mac in Orlando.  Then Miller played with fanciest schmaniest of  passers, Jason Williams on the Grizzlies.  More recently, he was a role player on the Heat next to Dwyane Wade and Lebron James; two guys known to make other world-type basketball shots pretty regularly.

All of that just to say that tonight James Johnson basically achieved the equivalent of "impressing Mikaela Maroney ('12 Summer Olympic Gymnast)" or if you want to be more relevant, "impressed Ashley Wagner ('13 Winter Olympic skater)".



Shoulda made a gif of a pleased Mike Miller face, you say?  Yeah, probably.

Kevin Seraphin Playing Flappy Birds

Sometimes the star of the video introduces it better than I ever could.



Good to see that if this NBA Power Forward/Center thing doesn't work out, Seraphin would make for a pretty good video game voice-over guy.  Or maybe even a Ronnie Brewer doppleganger.  Lots of options, you lucky guy.

*for audio, go to the top right of the video and click the "speaker".

The Kings Hang Out At Some DC Monuments

So I guess when you have a matinee game in D.C. on a Sunday and you don't play again until Tuesday night-a mere 6 hours away (Cleveland), the most logical thing is to go check out an American historical monument.  Makes sense and very appropriate considering Monday is president's day.

First, Quincy Acy throwing up deuces with his bearded forefather

Then Demarcus Cousins, Derrick Williams and Acy (again with the two fingers) take one of those candid self shots.

A slight haha to Demarcus calling the sixteenth president "AB" in his instagram caption

and then of course the best for last, Carl Landry throwing up the double hitch-hiker thumbs next to the Washington Monument.

Shoutout to the Kings for reminding us of the upcoming holiday and also reminding us that grown men in sweatshirts and sweatpants can still look hilarious posing next to famous monuments.

Too Much Cute Stuff Starring A Little Girl, Ricky Rubio and the Jazz Mascot

Warning that the images in the video below may be too cute for you to handle.




Any thoughts I may have had about the Jazz Bear not being a really chill mascot were thrown out in the wind after seeing the long haired bear take an adorable fan to hang with the players while the game was momentarily paused in last night's game.

Adorableness continues when Ricky Rubio decides to steal the moment from Jazzy Bear and transform it into a game of catch. In fact, if there was an nba player that seemed like he would be the best passer for delivering a soft yet accurate pass to a little girl, please tell me because Rubios the only guy on my list.  

To conclude it all, the Jazz bear tosses the little fan onto his shoulder and walks into the distance.  Hopefully to take her back to her family, but also to put a bow on this gift wrapped package of cuteness.  

Jeremy Lin's New Workout With the Volvo

Very all-around comedic effort by Jeremy Lin here as he starts the video off with some really good Blake Griffin stone faces.  Things really get goin' when he plays pickup ball against a guy who looks like Mike Epps plus Jason Terry's accessories combined together.

One of my fave moments is when he yelps "MONEY", cause you know if you played basketball in any capacity in the last 10 years, you've heard that one guy who insists using that phrase everytime he launches a three-pointer.

Overall, really liking the direction that Volvo is goin' with their car commercials in encroaching on the dry humor portion of the market dominated by the aforementioned Blake.  Specifically, I hope for more moments of Jeremy Lin defensive sliding around an SUV or maybe more cut scenes of him spiking basketballs tossed up by really ordinary-looking people with headbands.

Being Informed Of Blazer Things By Meyers Leonard

1. I did not expect that Will Barton had bounce like that
2. Back-up, Mo Will, has quite the proper family crest logo and a court with his name all over it

Not trying to hate on Meyers Leonard, but this seems to be as much as he has contributed to the NBA since I first heard of his double-last-name name almost two years ago.

Engagement Photos For Me Type of Weekend

Apologies for the lack of updates this weekend y'all.  I was off taking engagement photos which turned out being 300% more fun than I expected.  Yes, it was more than double the amount of fun I thought I would have.  This is despite the fact I was already pretty excited to get my chance of reenacting Steph Curry's engagement photo from a couple years back.

Also, I know my team's been getting its butt-whipped in the ole Homan League, but I promise the lack of week recaps isn't because I don't want to discuss how in the world I could lose Chris Paul-Jrue Holiday-Gordan Hayward to injuries in the matter of three days and not completely get destroyed in my weekly matchups.  Honest reason for the updates slowing down is that things at work changed a bit since the New Year and I've been a bit busier after work.  No worries though.  Thehoopology updates will continue trickling in as I get more adjusted with the 9-5.  Stay smiley, friends (even creepily, if-you-must, like Curry up above).

Proof That the Nuggets Are Doing Much Better in 2014

They stopped that 8-game losing streak on the 3rd day of the new year.

Nate Robinson is being Nate Robinson in the locker room, so everyone must be really annoyed or really entertained or maybe both.

They smashed on currently weak but formerly championship teams, Celtics and Lakers, by an average of 26.

JJ Hickson is rebounding everything

Evan Fournier might own grass-textured shoes, which look pretty cool to me.

Gallo looks like he's in good spirits despite the knee injury)

Timofy Mosgov had a word made out of him and is also pretty stellar at posing in pictures

Video: Harrison Barnes Walks Right Into Kendall Marshall's Kanye Joke

Tried for about 10 minutes to try to understand the context of of why Kanye West said those same words, but Kendall Marshall's version in messing with fellow Tar Heel, Harrison Barnes, was funny enough that I stopped caring about the origin of those words.

Pretty lawls that Harrison Barnes thought that Marshall was being serious when asking him about his cardigan although something should have looked awry when Kendall pulled out his cell phone. Never trust a man asking you about your sweater if he's already got a cellphone pointed at you.  Thats a pro-tip from me to you, Harrison.

*for audio, go to the top right of the video and click the "speaker".

Glenn Davis Did A Lot of Celebrating After His Game-Tying Three

The Magic and Bulls played a really intense game last night including a Mike Dunleavy clutch three, Jimmy Butler playing a lot of (specifically, 60) minutes, and Jameer Nelson doing Sam Cassell's most famous dance move.



The highlight of the game to me was Glenn Davis's game-tying three and subsequent series of im-da-best-player-of-the-basketball that followed the made shot.

 I'm still trying to get a gif of Oladipo hopping on by and patting Davis on the head cause I think that is an underrated aspect of the clip, but please don't miss out on all the barking from Davis and of course the kiss he blows.

Once more in GIF form, courtesy of SBNation:

Highlight: Jeremy Lin's Throws A Sky-High Alley-Oop to Dwight Howard

Really nice execution by Jeremy because both defenders were so deceived that neither of them were even in the key when Dwight caught the pass.  Also, check out Dwight mouthing to Jeremy something along the lines of "HOW DID YOU SEE DAT" at the end of the video.

A Nick Young Inspirational Quote Poster

Shoutout to the guy down the hall freshmen year of college who had the JFK quote poster that came to my mind and inspired the photoshop picture.

With the Lakers going 1 and 10 in the last 11 games, there hasn't been much in Laker land to be inspired by.  But leave it to Swaggy P to put things in perspective in the most run-on type of slightly poetic way.  Couple more commas and maybe some more consistency with that jumper and I'm totally with you, P.

A Comparison of Birthday Parties Between Tony Allen and Dwyane Wade

Two NBA shooting guards celebrated their birthdays today, the Memphis Grizzlies's tough-nosed defensive pest, Tony Allen, and the Heat's unconventional first name speller, Dwyane Wade.

T.A. had a pretty chill party with family, friends and a layered cake topped with a basketball.  Very elementary school style of cake, but if it was also an ice cream cake (cookies and cream flavor, duh), then I'd have to say he pretty much  covered all the necessities for celebrating his day of birth.

Wade?  Oh...he had a little get together on a 3 story yacht that was named after his self-given nickname.  

the NBA, where diversely cool birthday parties sometimes happen.

Leandro Barbosa is Back In The League, Let's Enjoy Some Old Videos Of Him.

It was announced today that Leandro Barbosa is back in the NBA. Barbosa signed a 10-day contract with the Phoenix Suns (his second stint with the team - the first being from 2003-2010).  Since it happens to be Thursday, I thought it would be appropriate to do that #throwbackthursday thing by reminding you all about the time that Barbosa made a video where he was one of the blue people from James Cameron's Avatar.



Or maybe you're a fan of something less fictional, than I present Leandro and one-time teammate, Reggie Evans, casually linking palms after a game:



and you probably didn't think that the Brazillian blur could purr out some Lionel Richie.



thats all.  happy thursday!

Everyone Was Messing With Demarcus Cousins Last Night

First, Demarcus had his taxi 12's stroked by Slamson the mascot with the most awesome name in the NBA because it is half pun and half of my name.



Then Cousins got videobombed by Isaiah Thomas when Little Isaiah was lifted in the air by Quincy Acy during his post game interview.  Someone (i suspect it was isaiah again) even dared to jack Demarcus' trademark headband.  

Cousins tied his season high for points last night with 35 and the Kings held on to beat the division-leading Blazers despite damian lillard almost literally making all the threes he took at the end of the game.  An overall, very entertaining game for the Kings big scary dude.

Nickname Suggestions For Three Brooklyn Nets Players

If you haven't read about it already, the first of three "nickname jersey" games will be played this Friday between the Brooklyn Nets and the Miami Heat.  Players from both teams will wear nicknames on their uniforms rather than the names their mama's gave them.

If this sounds like a cheesy way to sell some extra jerseys and sound strangely similar to what Chad Johnson voluntarily did for himself when he was on the Cincinatti Bengals, then I completely agree. But it could be worse.  It could be more sleeved jerseys.

This afternoon the Sun-Sentinal reported what the 15 nicknames the Miami Heat players will wear.  I've copied over the list for your enjoyment:

Joel Anthony: "Doc"
Shane Battier: "Battle"
Michael Beasley: "B Easy"
Chris Bosh: "CB"
Mario Chalmers: "Rio"
Norris Cole: "Cole Train"
Udonis Haslem: "UD"
LeBron James: "King James"
James Jones: "JJ"
Rashard Lewis: "Sweet Lew"
Roger Mason Jr.: "MoneyMase"
Greg Oden: "G.O."
Dwyane Wade: "D.Wade"

Since the Nets haven't released a similar article of their own, I guess I will have to wait in suspense about what guys in the locker room call Tornike Shengelia or if Tyshawn Taylor goes by "Ty Ty" or "Tay Tay". I did come up with the three best nicknames I could make up for the Nets players that don't already have well-known nicknames of their own. They are...

1. Alan "Alan" Anderson

Cause thats his first name but also because thats what you get when you combine the first two letters of his first name with the first two letters of his last name.

2.  Mirza "Bear Hater" Teletovic  

Cause he once joked about tearing apart the huge mammal on his twitter account. Figuratively, of course.

3. Mason "Jar of" Plumlee

Cause Roger Mason already has "Money Mase" on his jersey and only a guy who went to Duke could pull off having a preposition as a nickname.

Chris Andersen and Greg Stiesma Face Swap

Sometimes two guys can be basically be the same height (6'10" and 6'11") and the same weight (245 lbs and 260 lbs) and have faces that totally look normal when applied to either players' bodies.

One, Chris Andersen Twins

Two, Greg Stiemsma Twins

Then with some help from my fiance, the below images were put together to help me conclude that the Birdman and Big Greg could totally be brothers or just guys with really interchangeable faces.

image originally accessed on nba.com
Credit: Issac Baldizon/NBAE/Getty Images

Highlight: Warriors Get Ridiculous With An Off-The-Backboard Alley-Oop

Lots of attention on NBA TV given to the left-handed pass Curry throws off the backboard, but how about how David Lee dribbled across the key with his off-handed before dishing out a screwball-style pass to Curry to set off the circus oop pass?   Or even going back a bit further and questioning why the heck Iguodala was throwing an entry pass to post up David Lee on Trevor Booker at basically the three-point line.  Finally, I hope y'all caught Andrew Bogut staring at his right hand the way that Shaq used to do, all the while giggling down the court  at presumably how unlikely of an alley-oop he just completed.  Almost a ridiculous-ness overload for me, but then again-not really, because these type of possessions are exactly the type I get giddy and can't wait to write and share with you all.  Happy Monday everyone!